What is happiness all about? It’s a fascinating question. It’s all we want it in our lives but we don’t necessarily know how to obtain it, right? We see others with it and ask “how have they managed to get it and I haven’t?”.
We seem to be in constant pursue of it, this never ending illusion of trickery. That was me. I yearned to grasp its meaning and how to capture it. I was in search of the elusive happiness, I wanted it in my life and I wasn’t going to stop until I found it. Happiness was my mission and when I found it I wanted to help others to discover it too.
In the beginning.
My start out in life wasn’t that bright. Don’t get me wrong, I had loving parents but they were desperately caught up in their own extreme mental health issues as well as alcohol abuse, that unhappiness became a familiar face within my upbringing; it is therefore not surprising that I found happiness elusive.
However, childhood curiosity has never left me and has led me to search for something more, to find the source of happiness and explore ways to live the best I can.
When we ask ‘What is happiness all about?’ it is all determined by the meaning you put on it. Oxford Dictionary defines it as ‘The state of being happy’, with synonyms such as contentment, pleasure and satisfaction, all of which are born from within. I think for a long time it never registered to me that my happiness came from being me, I thought I gained it from things outside of me, what a revelation that was.
In this life we are dealt a pack of cards and then left to make sense of them. We find ourselves trying to get the cards off others to make that perfect suit. Saying things to ourselves like ‘I wish I had parents like yours’, ‘if only I looked like her’, ‘you’re so lucky, why can’t I be lucky like you’? ‘Your house is amazing!!!!!, I would be so happy if I had a house like yours’. All of these things creating an illusional form of happiness.
We are conditioned to believe we are not good enough, we need more, have to look attractive or have to do more to feel worthy. Life is so busy with the many external factors creating waves to deter our desire for the truth about what happiness is and we so we are left pursuing, overlooking the fact that we are enough just as we are. So we need reminding of that.
It’s a beautiful peculiar world we live in and being human is complex or so we think it is, we complicate it more than needs be, too often I had heard the phrase ‘we get in our own way’ but I still continued to do it. What does get in our own way even mean? I now see it as trying too hard to make things better, rather than just accepting, I’m okay.
The magical world of happiness.
The psychologist Carl Rogers says ‘The curious paradox is that when I accept myself just as I am, then I can change’. What a magical idea and one now that I grasp.
The more I accept myself each day, the more I become open to new possibilities and in tune with inner contentment, satisfaction and pleasure. In turn as this becomes heightened I begin to experience the happiness that was once desired. How beautiful is that.
When we are in the state of happiness, we see the magic that is before us, the beauty of nature that surrounds us, the love for this ever connected existence we lead. It allows us to believe as Audrey Hepburn put it, ‘nothing is impossible, the very word itself says I’M POSSIBLE.’
I would love to hear from you, about your experiences, or if I can help in anyway, feel free to leave comments below.
Remember happiness starts with you.
All the best